Sudah Sudah La Anwar Ibrahim....

I have had enough. I personally think Anwar Ibrahim is stupid. He thinks with his dick (in someone else ass). Get done with it Anwar. Face the trial and stop postponing on a stupid reason.

Anwar Ibrahimn is a stupid as Nabil who did not want to comment about his kissing act exposed by the media recently. The different is that, Anwar denies that he did commit anal intercourse with Saiful. For Nabil though,  "No Comment" is as good as "I did it",  you idiot.

-PP-

Busy....

Kind of busy lately.

Will be right back later.

Till then, you are still an idiot.

-PP-

Raja Lawak

Anwar Ibrahim, Nik Aziz dan Dr. Rozmey dikatakan telah menubuhkan sebuah kumpulan lawak bagi menyertai pertandingan Raja Lawak Astro musim terbaru ini.  Berpandukan kepada andaian untuk menumpang populariti dan tuah kumpulan Sepah, Nik Aziz dan Dr Rozmey telah mencadangkan agar kumpulan mereka dinamakan Sumpah.

Bagaimanapun, cadangan tersebut telah ditentang sekeras kerasnya oleh Anwar Ibrahim kerana bimbang menimbulkan persepsi masyarakat tentang keengganannya bersumpah terhadap tuduhan liwat seperti yang dilakukan oleh Saiful.

Hasil perbincangan, mereka akhrnya bersetuju untuk menamakan kumpulan mereka sebagai kumpulan Sampah.

-PP-

Fakta Tentang Lawak

Fakta 1.
Harian Metro merupakan akhbar yang paling lawak. Ketika akhbar lain sibuk dengan berita berita tentang bencana, tragedi, politik dll, Harian Metro lebih senang bercerita tentang siswi melacur, pusat urut batin dan sebagainya. Yang paling kelakar, cerita tentang rahsia kegebuan janda Akhil Hay, Maizawati. Tang mana gebu pun ntah la.


Fakta 2.
Lupakan majalah Ujang atau Gila Gila dan yang seangkatan dengannya sebagai majalah lawak yang mengungguli pasaran negara. Majalah paling kelakar sekarang ini ialah majalah Mastika, dengan cerita cerita yang susah nak diterima akal dan gaya penulisan yang memang kelakar. Mastika, sebuah majalah ilmiah pada satu ketika dahulu sekarang menjadi majalah lawak antarabangsa. Tahniah.


Fakta 3.
Kedudukan Anwar Ibrahim sebagai Raja Lawak nombor satu Malaysia kini tergugat dengan kehadiran Dr. Rozmey. Anwar yang berjaya menduduki takhta dengan lawak jenaka 16 September selama 2 tahun telah dikalahkan oleh Dr. Rozmey dengan lawak 40 juta dan yang terbaru, mengundang Pamela Anderson untuk berlakon dalam filem terbitan yang akan datang. Syabas DDR !! (Nik Aziz sedang mengejar dari belakang dengan lawak pangkah PAS masuk syurga)


-PP-

Easy Successful Formula

Followings are the list of characteristic and quality for becoming a successful person in any organisation, such as corporate and political party :

Brilliant

Obedient

Discipline

Efficient

Knowledgeable

It is easy. Just remember BODEK.

-PP-

Dua Alam

Saya hidup dalam dua alam. Pertama, di alam fantasi, jumlah pembaca blog ini adalah seramai 40 juta orang. Tetapi, di alam realiti cuma beberapa kerat sahaja. Itu pun secara tak sengaja sebab "google" hantu kopek.

Kalau Dua Alam Dr. Rozmey mampu memecah panggung, dua alam saya cuma sekadar memecah punggung.

Terima kasih Dr. kerana membuat saya tersenyum.

-PP-

Spritual Posting

A little bit on the serious side :

"Syurga dan neraka adalah urusan Tuhan untuk hambanya samada yang taat atau yang ingkar terhadap tuntutanNya"

...... and now, on the not so serious note :

"Syurga dan neraka bukanlah urusan Nik Aziz dan konco konconya"

Pangkah PAS masuk syurga konon.

-PP-

Lambang Keagungan Cinta

Jika Romeo dan Juliet serta Shah Jehan dan Mumtaz menjadi lambang keagungan cinta masyarakat Barat dan India, kita di Malaysia juga boleh berbangga dengan kisah cinta Mek Wook dan Mohd Nor.

Keagungan cinta Mek Wook terhadap suaminya dibuktikan dengan sanggup bersusah payah membuang wang ringgit dan masa untuk menjamin suaminya yang ditangkap kerana menghisap dadah buat kali kedua.

Sebagai lambang kasih sayang terhadap Mek Wook, suaminya patut membina sebuah tunggu cinta seperti Taj Mahal di pusat pemulihan dadah yang seterusnya.

Semoga perkahwinan Mek Wook dan suaminya kekal hingga ke akhir hayat. Nak cakap kekal hingga ke anak cucu rasanya macam tak kena sebab tak mungkin Mek Wook boleh beranak lagi.

-PP-

Antara Dua Pilihan

I just came back from a day trip to Singapore and I observed a significant difference between Changi Airport and KLIA in term of the toilets. This is just my observation and I don't really care if you do not agree with me.

In Changi Airport, the toilets are plentiful and easily located while in KLIA you really need to look for the toilet to find one. For majority of us, the toilet in KLIA is better because there is water compared to the toilet in Changi Airport which is of the "tissue" type, if you get what am I trying to say.

In case of an "emergency" however, I prefer to be in Changi Airport (tissue pun tissue la) rather than making fool of myself for being "terkucil" in the pants, while searching for a toilet, in front of few hundred people consisting of the followings:

1. Stewardess
2. Pilots
3. Penjual arak dan rokok bebas cukai
4. Perempuan indon tukang cuci toilet
5. Bangla tukang tolak troli
6. Ulat teksi
7. Perempuan indon tukang sapu lantai
8. Perempuan Myanmar yg sedang menunggu kapal terbang untuk ke Cambodia.

-PP-

One Happy Groin

With the abolishment of the import duty for underwear by the Government in the 2011 Budget, I can now shop for Calvin Klein undies and no more wearing those cheap "pasar malam" underwear.

Thanks to the Government, my groin will be singing happily now.

1 Malaysia Rocks, Calvin Klein Rocks !

-PP-

Iklan : Syarikat Pengeluar Kondom

Selain dari alat pencegah kehamilan, kondom juga berfungsi untuk mengelakkan penyebaran penyakit yang berjangkit melalui hubungan seksual.

Oleh itu, pakailah kondom ketika meliwat budak pembancuh kopi anda. Walaupun tiada kemungkinan untuk hamil, penggunaan kondom boleh mencegah penyakit merbahaya yang disebarkan melalui hubungan seks, samada ikut tabie atau tidak.

Sila ambil perhatian bahawa meliwat adalah haram di sisi agama dan merupakan kesalahan jenayah.

Belia benci liwat !!

-PP-
Sent via BlackBerry from Maxis

Idiots Are Friends

These are a few people (not in particular order) that somehow or rather have an influence to my life :

1. Anwar Ibrahim
2. Ayah Pin
3. Samy Velu
4. Dr. Rozmey 40 juta

What they have in common is the proof that people are easily fooled. Take Ayah Pin for example, his followers includes professionals from the big cities. Samy Velu too, almost reach immortality by being the longest serving MIC President.
Make friends with idiots and you will be highly regarded.

-PP-
Sent via BlackBerry from Maxis

Advice For Guys

Guys, take this advice from me. Once you are married, try to put yourself in your wife's shoes. You might like nagging and shopping.

-PP-
Sent via BlackBerry from Maxis

This, I Tell You, Cannot Work

I found this proverbs puzzling -

Sambil Menyelam Minum Air - Should anyone tries this and survive from drowning, feel free to leave a comment. I want to learn how.

Nasi Dah Menjadi Bubur - Never seen this happen in my life before. Bubur jadi nasi hangus tu pernah la.

-PP-

Sent via BlackBerry from Maxis

Definition of Irony

Simple definition of irony goes like this :-

"Hujan ni, nak pegi swimming jugak ke? Nanti basah "

-PP-

Malaysia Needs A Smarter Villain

I read in the newspaper about two geniuses being detained by the Police for allegedly extorting money from an Indian housewife for the safe relief of her husband who went missing for quite sometime ago.


The money was supposed to be the down payment for the ransom to release her "kidnapped" husband,  from the total of 1 million ransom.


Aisey, what were you thinking dudes? Hire Purchase plan like, pay the down payment and we will deliver your husband with the balance to be paid on a monthly fixed installment for certain period of time? What happen if the wife default on the monthly payment? Send someone to reposes the husband?


We really in need of smarter villains....


-PP-

You Call Me Just Now?

I hate this.

Quite a few times I called someone but the call went unanswered. Fair enough, maybe the person was busy or something.  A short while later, I received SMS asking something like " U call me just now?" or "Ada call I ke tadi?". 

I wish I could respond with something like this - "Nope, I did not, it was my smartphone (obviously, smarter than u). Everyday, it will scan the address book and automatically place a call to the idiot of the day. Tq for making my day."

-PP-

Iklan - Ada Apa Dengan Radhi OAG

Radhi OAG is an idiot.

I was first want to say that Radhi OAG is a clown but that would be an insult to the clowns all over the world who dedicated their life entertaining people and much loved by everybody especially the children.

So, stupid he is.

(Please Google for Radhi's stupid act)

On a related note, showing "Peace" sign to the reporter while in lock up uniform for a drug related charge is not smart either. 

-PP-

Saturday Groceries Shopping

I live in Selangor. Every Saturday, in conjunction with the State Government "Love The Environment" campaign, plastic bags cost 20 sen, at least, this is the practiced of the hypermarket and convenient store statewide. Petty traders just don't care. Plastic bag or no plastic bag , they need to run the business.

I once asked what happen to the 20 sen paid for the plastic bag and was made to understand that it will go to the charity which is good, if it really goes to charity la.

Despite having to pay for the plastic bag, I love doing groceries shopping on Saturday. Hassle free, as there are not so many people around. I am not an environmentalist, I guess but I do contribute 20 sen for a good cause.

The other people who are not doing their shopping on Saturday are not environmentalist either. They are just damn stingy to come out with 20 sen. They shop on the other day and ask for plastic bags and this time for FREE. What a loser......

Save Khalid Ibrahim, Save The Environment.

-PP-

Facebook......

I was kind of bored, so I have this thought of leaving a comment to every status update by my friends in Facebook, except for the followings:

1. Bragging status such as "I am so cute", my son is so smart.

2. Stupid question status like "Nak makan kat mana ek hari ni? Who the fuck cares, I don't even know your location, stupid.

3. Display of affection, things like I love you, darling, between unmarried couple. Helloo....private messaging was created for a reason.

4. Religious related status.

5. Political inclined status (except for Samy Vellu)

6. Less than 5 words status.

I end of staring at my computer for the rest of the day.

-PP-