28 March 2006

The Advantages of Swearing

(This entry has been classified as 18SX. So if you are a parent reading this to your child, you might replace the word fuck, shit etc with toot, beep etc. Or you may read it as F-asterisk-asterisk- K or S-asterisk-asterisk-T. For those underage person reading this you may visualize the word is typed as F**k or S**t. )

People hate when you swear. Kalau tengok TV or wayang when the actors swear, mesti kene “bleep” punya la. Logically, swearing is considered as rude, kurang ajar dan tidak sopan. But then, has anybody ever noticed that you can gain some advantage if you swear?

Swearing Makes You Look Cool.
Sangat sangat cool sebenarnya. Hollywood actors swear a lot in the action movies. Swearing makes you look tough and you will gain some respect from the audience. By swearing the word fuck! Or shit! in the middle of gun fight, your chance of survival is very high. Even the bad guys look cool if they swear at the point of dying.

Swearing Relieves Your Stress.
You had a lot of work in the office and on the way back, you are stuck in the traffic jam. Some idiot suddenly drives recklessly in front of your car. What do you do? Of course all that words like Fuck you! Shit! will come out from your mouth. Then anda akan sangat rasa lega kerana anda sudah berjaya melepaskan perasaan anda tanpa menumpahkan setitik darah. Dengan memaki di dalam kereta anda akan berjaya mengelakkan pertengkaran yang lebih buruk apabila tiba di rumah kerana anda tidak lagi perlu memaki isteri anda sendiri. Perlu diingatkan sekiranya anda rasa tertekan di opis, jangan cuba memaki boss anda kerana itu adalah satu perbuatan yang sangat bodoh.

Swearing Saves Your Time and Increase Your Productivity.
Imagine this; you are busy in the office. Your co-worker suddenly comes in your room and wants to discuss about his/her stupid idea. He/She might not be listening to you if you told him/her nicely that you are busy and will probably continue to sit down in front of you and waste a few hours of your time. But then, if you utter the sentence like “Fuck you asshole! I am fucking busy and I do not want to listen to your stupid fucking idea. Get the hell out of here!” Pipi pasti individu tersebut akan sangat terkejut dan akan perlahan lahan membawa diri. The result? You won’t be disturbed, you can finish your work on time and the boss loves you. So, who said swearing is bad?

Swearing Makes You Closer to Your Friends
If you swear to your mates, they will definitely swear back at you and all of you end up laughing. Swearing bonds all of us. So next time, when you are meeting your friends, instead of greeting the word Hi or Hello, you may greet them with Fuck You! Please be cautious though. Don’t swear to a stranger with an intention to make new friend. The only friends that you will get are the doctors and nurses in the hospital.

Happy Swearing to all of you!!

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